Oh my friend, my friend. Dear brutiful Jeffji. Does IFS teach you to shit-talk Fred like that? Telling him to shut up and scram lest he get his whiny little ass kicked by your more macho selves...? Is the point of IFS to bully yourself?
I dunno, just a silly thought...but... what if you recognized Fred not as "depression," but as grief? What if Fred were a dear friend of yours who had just lost something deeply precious to him? How would you talk to him then? Or would you maybe give him a hug and a nice hot cup of tea? Show the guy some love?
This is a constructive take on the potential usefulness of the Fred-as-avatar-of-depression model.
Another amazing post, Jeff. Wonderful in it's honesty and humility–a graceful exploration of the question: How do we accept the winding down of our physical capacities, of the "self" we've come to know and rely on, and prepare to journey onward as our "eternal self"?
As we all have so much to learn from the process of illness>dying>death, yet seldom talk about it unless it concerns us directly, I'm very much in favor of reading more contemplation and reflection.
You've trained your whole life for this. Not only as a writer, but as one who's learned to see himself as continuous and clearly interconnected (as your community of friends seem to attest to).
Your past writing tells me you're exactly the right person to help bring perspective to the most meaningful transition we'll all have to make. Your luminosity, insight, and Jeffji way of seeing is exactly why I'm tuned in. You've got my attention and gratitude.
Wishing you the best in your daily practice of getting up and on with each moment of the day.
Reading your post, I felt like I really settled into my body, and sensed yours over there across the bridge. That's what your writing does: lets people feel all of themselves, even the lugubrious Fred piece, and also gives them access to a beautiful soul that's honest about what he's going through. I wish you light, and I thank you for this post. I can't wait to hear about the red light helmet. Maybe you should do a go fund me campaign and get it sooner rather than later.
I'm all in favor of a gofundme campaign for the red light helmet, Jeffji. No point in waiting a year if it's something that can help sooner! You can count on my donation.
Hey Jeff, maybe you'd like to put my MDMA journey contribution into a helmet rather than an MDMA journey? And don't forget the Theradome helmet I'd offered you before Sedona.
Jeff, your writing is a light all it's own. The photos you curate are in themselves bursting with expression and reflection along side your writing. Your Substack is a superb share. Your experience with Parkinsons is helpful to me even though I am not afflicted by it.
I am sending you lots of light and love from the shores of the Sea of Cortez. I have to say that Jim’s mood and depression has lifted in the past two weeks since we arrived to our Baja home. We sleep outside every night, play in the sea and sun all day, exercise regularly and are surrounded by a group of close friends. We are so lucky to be able to do that. Yet, there are days when his mood darkens and his spirit plunges. On those days intey to just let him be. An extra dose of testosterone helps as well.
Your statement about the chicken or the egg question regarding depression and anxiety is accurate, however it is also a known fact that the side effects of Parkinson's medications cause anxiety often bordering paranoia. Managing Jim's medications has been quite challenging. We are also going to Stanford to start DBS evaluation process in April and hoping he will qualify.
Be well Jeffy and keep writing. I think of you often.
Thank you, Alenka, you are indeed super fortunate. But yes, the inner turmoil does rear its head... And wow, DBS is a big step. My warmest good wishes to both of you.
It's also poignant reference to the beauty IN "pain" - if originally about a boy's cane? Maybe it's a made-up story I heard once, but either way - the candy cane is "wonder-full-y" there, stripes or not - another glowing perspective. Thanks for this gift, Jeff.
Your Mountain View pics are superb! And your writing/observations/thoughts are lovely. I wish I had some magic wand to help. Will beam some positivity north from Mexico. ❤️❤️❤️Best wishes for 2026!
Oh my friend, my friend. Dear brutiful Jeffji. Does IFS teach you to shit-talk Fred like that? Telling him to shut up and scram lest he get his whiny little ass kicked by your more macho selves...? Is the point of IFS to bully yourself?
I dunno, just a silly thought...but... what if you recognized Fred not as "depression," but as grief? What if Fred were a dear friend of yours who had just lost something deeply precious to him? How would you talk to him then? Or would you maybe give him a hug and a nice hot cup of tea? Show the guy some love?
Wishing you self-compassion.
This is a constructive take on the potential usefulness of the Fred-as-avatar-of-depression model.
Another amazing post, Jeff. Wonderful in it's honesty and humility–a graceful exploration of the question: How do we accept the winding down of our physical capacities, of the "self" we've come to know and rely on, and prepare to journey onward as our "eternal self"?
As we all have so much to learn from the process of illness>dying>death, yet seldom talk about it unless it concerns us directly, I'm very much in favor of reading more contemplation and reflection.
You've trained your whole life for this. Not only as a writer, but as one who's learned to see himself as continuous and clearly interconnected (as your community of friends seem to attest to).
Your past writing tells me you're exactly the right person to help bring perspective to the most meaningful transition we'll all have to make. Your luminosity, insight, and Jeffji way of seeing is exactly why I'm tuned in. You've got my attention and gratitude.
Wishing you the best in your daily practice of getting up and on with each moment of the day.
Gosh, Kelsey, thank you so much for this lovely missive. My warmest good wishes back to you, as well.
Thank you, friend. And you are so right about the grief masked as depression...
Oh such a good and useful comment. Self-compassion. Why is that so elusive?
Reading your post, I felt like I really settled into my body, and sensed yours over there across the bridge. That's what your writing does: lets people feel all of themselves, even the lugubrious Fred piece, and also gives them access to a beautiful soul that's honest about what he's going through. I wish you light, and I thank you for this post. I can't wait to hear about the red light helmet. Maybe you should do a go fund me campaign and get it sooner rather than later.
I'm all in favor of a gofundme campaign for the red light helmet, Jeffji. No point in waiting a year if it's something that can help sooner! You can count on my donation.
Hey Jeff, maybe you'd like to put my MDMA journey contribution into a helmet rather than an MDMA journey? And don't forget the Theradome helmet I'd offered you before Sedona.
Thanks so much, Erin.
"I don't want to de-stripe anyone's candy cane" is top tier writing.
Happy New Year!
Thank you for the glimpse inside the Exploratorium.
And, how could I not love the line ‘de-stripe anyone’s candy cane’?
Beautiful photos of Mountain View! Sending you light and blessings for the New Year.
Jeff, your writing is a light all it's own. The photos you curate are in themselves bursting with expression and reflection along side your writing. Your Substack is a superb share. Your experience with Parkinsons is helpful to me even though I am not afflicted by it.
Dear Jeff,
I am sending you lots of light and love from the shores of the Sea of Cortez. I have to say that Jim’s mood and depression has lifted in the past two weeks since we arrived to our Baja home. We sleep outside every night, play in the sea and sun all day, exercise regularly and are surrounded by a group of close friends. We are so lucky to be able to do that. Yet, there are days when his mood darkens and his spirit plunges. On those days intey to just let him be. An extra dose of testosterone helps as well.
Your statement about the chicken or the egg question regarding depression and anxiety is accurate, however it is also a known fact that the side effects of Parkinson's medications cause anxiety often bordering paranoia. Managing Jim's medications has been quite challenging. We are also going to Stanford to start DBS evaluation process in April and hoping he will qualify.
Be well Jeffy and keep writing. I think of you often.
Thank you, Alenka, you are indeed super fortunate. But yes, the inner turmoil does rear its head... And wow, DBS is a big step. My warmest good wishes to both of you.
I enjoy hearing your perspectives and getting a glimpse into your life. Thank you for sharing yourself here. Sending you love and light.
Thank you so much, Julie. Wishing you well.
It's also poignant reference to the beauty IN "pain" - if originally about a boy's cane? Maybe it's a made-up story I heard once, but either way - the candy cane is "wonder-full-y" there, stripes or not - another glowing perspective. Thanks for this gift, Jeff.
Thank you, Molly, for this and much more.
Your Mountain View pics are superb! And your writing/observations/thoughts are lovely. I wish I had some magic wand to help. Will beam some positivity north from Mexico. ❤️❤️❤️Best wishes for 2026!
Same for you, Rob!
Lunch soon!
Thank you for this.
Wishing all the best in 2026, Jeff! ❤️
I'm sending you a hug and hoping it gets you a nice little shot of dopamine!